Have you ever tried to borrow a pen or book, and promised to return it? I believed everybody has its own kind of experience. The question is: did you take it seriously or you don’t mind if you’ll return it on time?
If you fail to fulfill your promise, it is just a word of mouth that blew away in the air. If you fulfill your promise, it’s a word of honor.
When we borrow something and failed to return it—you didn’t value your word and the kindness of the borrower. The first thing that we should practice is to start learning to appreciate—small or big things. Borrowing small things such as pen doesn’t remain as small things. The effect of it—is big. It’s a big reflection of who you are as a person. Learn to value small thing so you can learn to value big things. This is the reason why we must honor the words we say and not just associate it as mere word of mouth.
What we value if we honor our word
Have you experienced someone who is in agreement with you and then when both of you meet again? He didn’t know anything that you both agreed upon. It’s like nothing had happened before and seems both of you don’t have any agreement at all. This has happened to me a lot of times with different kind of people. So disappointing, isn’t it?
Why did these things happen? Why such people seems no heart to treasure your word and take it seriously? We all know that people have different backgrounds and culture. They have been raised by their parents differently, some are not fed well about the value of the word. That’s the sad truth. Integrity should be taught as early as their childhood.
One thing that I discover is people look at the status of a person that he talked to. If they in agreement with a person of low status, they tend to disregard and not take it seriously. In other words, they belittle and look down a person. They think that they are not too important to them. This sounds a very disheartening truth in our society. They could sacrifice their integrity because there is no impact and effect on them after all. What if they have in agreement with a billionaire, a high-status person or high government official like Mayor, Senator etc..? I think they will take it seriously without wasting even a nick of time. They could even have a sleepless night because they become worried of not fulfilling their promises on time. See what I mean?
People don’t understand what are the things that we value if we honor our word. What we value are the following:
- You are a real person if you value yourself. People may easily recognize if you are a valuable person. It is not by the status of living but from what you’re committed to doing to let others feel important.
- Without the word of honor, you lose integrity. As simple as that, no excuse for any reason. If you can’t fulfill your promises, the best that you can do is an early advice that you can’t make it and do apologize. Don’t wait for the things to happen before you apologize, it’s too late and no use.
- If a person has no self-respect, he might also have a difficulty to respect others. People will lose respect if you didn’t have a word of honor. There’s a saying that if a man does not have a word of honor, he is a woman. Because men value his word more than women. How true is that? Women may easily shift and break promises rather than men. In my opinion, word of honor is not by gender, it’s integrity—it’s the word that counts.
To be a person with a word of Honor is to be conscious enough to apply this saying, “Don’t do unto others what you don’t want to be done unto you” by Confucius. In other words, you should put yourself in the shoes of others. Don’t be self-centered or selfish. We always don’t realize what we are doing and tends to criticize others without looking first the mirror. We failed to think, assess and reflect who we are as a person. This is where people need life coaching so they will be guided to become a better person. The word of honor is not an easy task to accomplish, it’s always pointing at you before you done your part.
“Always prefer the plain direct word to the long, vague one. Don’t implement promises, but keep them.” C.S. Lewis